Family Guy MFK

Continuing the MFKs of my favorite things, this week I bring you Family Guy with commentary from my good friend and fellow writer Matthew Dunlap!

Guys: Peter, Brian, Stewie

Peter - Fuck.  Honestly, the only reason I picked fuck is because I couldn't put up with his shennanigans for marriage, and I already figured out who I was going to kill.

Brian - Marry.  He's pretty intelligent even if he can get douchy at times whenever he enjoys even the slightest bit of success.  If he ever got under my skin too much, I could just call animal control and nip that shit in the bud.  Let's not forget that golden singing voice and the fact that he's into big band music.

Stewie - Kill.  We see what happens to Stewie in the future.  A thirty something virgin working a dead end job living with childhood teddy bear (hey...wasn't that the plot of Ted minus the virgin part, hehe).  Sorry Stewie.  You had potential, but you totally failed in your attempts for world domination, and I'm a power hungry bitch.

Girls: Lois, Meg, Bonnie

Lois - Fuck.  Lois was wild and crazy in her bygone days, and we've seen it doesn't take much for her to get that back.  I mean KISS referred to her as "loose Lois."  You would never be bored in bed with her, and if you can get your hands on a time machine or make friends with Death you get to experience 18 year old Lois.  Hawt!

Meg - Kill.  I don't really think I even need to explain this.

Bonnie - Marry. Bonny can put up with a lot of shit.  She's been married to Joe so she's had to take care of someone physically handicapped for a long time.  She would be an awesome wife and totally appreciate it if you had the use of your legs.

Matt's Take

Peter - Fuck.  I can't tolerate his shennanigans for too long.

Brian - Marry.  We'll have good times smoking pot and drinking at upscale jazz bars.

Stewie - Kill.  I don't trust life with him and he's proven to be a terrible lay.

Lois - Marry.  She's a housewife through and through.

Meg - Kill.  Just ew.

Bonnie - Fuck.  She would be a tiger in the bedroom with all that pend up sexual desire.